Sunday, June 20, 2010

What Mothers Do, Especially When it Looks Like Nothing by Naomi Stadlen

If you're a new Mom, this book is really, really, really worth reading. At a time that I found very difficult, this book was often the only thing that would give me any comfort. Because it includes loads of quotes from mothers, it made me feel less alone in what I was feeling. The way the author phrased and explained things gave me recognition in a situation where I often felt like I was doing nothing.

Books like this are so important. I must say that no matter how many questions I asked beforehand and how many books I read, nothing could have prepared me for those first weeks/months of being a mother. It's hard, frustrating, tiring and often lonesome, as well as being a beautiful time. All the things you're feeling are really intense and for some reason difficult to explain properly. And you can't really complain because something wonderful has happened in your life and you should be happy. Naomi Stadlen's book offered the honesty of other mothers that I needed to hear - it's not easy, you don't always like it or handle it well, and that's ok. 

I picked up several things that made life easier for me. For example, one mother in the book remarked how much simpler life became once she stopped fighting against what her baby wanted. Once she accepted that whatever the baby wanted was fine, things became easier. I have to remind myself to stop trying to control the situation all the time and I have to say that if I manage to let go everything improves.

One of the more interesting ideas in the book is a discussion of language and how it's lacking the vocabulary to explain certain things about motherhood. The author argues that this is because in the past certain behaviors and realities were the norm and now society is very different. Life has changed but language has remained the same and a gap now exists. The book is worth reading even only for these language observations, very interesting.

I recommend this one whole-heartedly and will be buying it for any new mothers that I know.

Challenges: 2010 Countdown Challenge, Women Unbound Challenge


Michele said...

Where, oh where was this book when my kidlets were babies????? I could have used it. But it sounds like it would make a great baby shower gift!

joanna said...

It would make a GREAT baby shower gift! But it really only makes sense to read it when baby is here...